what does an angel headed young man do
when he feels the invisible razor of shame cut thru?
grudge fuck a stranger . or two . thinking the whole time of you
revulsion spins in a visceral pool
remorse from my mouth like unspooling drool
in ecstasy my body writhes just a stranger's tool
the moment lacks rhythm and meaning but mine
is not to create perfect meters with rhyme
each line is jagged and I'm mindless of time
I want to hurt you . that's all that I want
yet be faithful knowing the whole while that I'm not
I love you . but don't want to . it hurts me . F*CK!!!
Friday, May 23, 2008
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Gawkward
I stand silently . gawking
awkwardly feeling alone . but more importantly .
I feel you purposefully distant from me
.
You are in control of yourself . very well . very well done
speaking seemingly in serious tones . it's just business
and all the while I'm silent, gawking, awkwardly listening
.
I could be on the other side of the world . and . feel less alone
listening to the HOOO'S and HOWLS dancing naked
surrounded by ppl like me who love to have fun
.
There's a certain sadness to the lonesomeness of
standing silently, gawking, awkwardly listening
being romanced by your language yet disconnected
.
it's better to set me free into the wind and let me fly away
awkwardly feeling alone . but more importantly .
I feel you purposefully distant from me
.
You are in control of yourself . very well . very well done
speaking seemingly in serious tones . it's just business
and all the while I'm silent, gawking, awkwardly listening
.
I could be on the other side of the world . and . feel less alone
listening to the HOOO'S and HOWLS dancing naked
surrounded by ppl like me who love to have fun
.
There's a certain sadness to the lonesomeness of
standing silently, gawking, awkwardly listening
being romanced by your language yet disconnected
.
it's better to set me free into the wind and let me fly away
An Inconvenient Sidekick
I manifest like a cycling wind of dust
hearing u speak a language that romances me
and isolates me all at once
.
Gone are the gestures you give when we are alone
kisses
embraces and words of devotion . you are good
.
I wuld have never guessed you for a player . or . could it be
you are ashamed of me? I cannot really know
because you translate what is in your interest to
.
I stand in the darkness of ignorance
why didn't I take Spanish like I meant to?
why can't I just trust that you're telling me everything?
.
If the gestures you grace me with were still there
kisses
embraces and words of devotion . maybe I culd
.
but there's a certain spot of intelligence within my brain
that infers and I believe it is correctly
that I am an inconvenient sidekick . and . that's not good enough
hearing u speak a language that romances me
and isolates me all at once
.
Gone are the gestures you give when we are alone
kisses
embraces and words of devotion . you are good
.
I wuld have never guessed you for a player . or . could it be
you are ashamed of me? I cannot really know
because you translate what is in your interest to
.
I stand in the darkness of ignorance
why didn't I take Spanish like I meant to?
why can't I just trust that you're telling me everything?
.
If the gestures you grace me with were still there
kisses
embraces and words of devotion . maybe I culd
.
but there's a certain spot of intelligence within my brain
that infers and I believe it is correctly
that I am an inconvenient sidekick . and . that's not good enough
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